Dear Mom, Let It Go. Yes, You.
Dear mom who needs to let go of mom guilt, yup that’s as Elsa would sing “Let it go” was she talking to us- probably. This whole mom guilt can eat at you and there is no rhyme or reason why we all do this to ourselves. The feelings of not being good enough, not playing with the kids enough, or that you yelled far too much today. All of these feelings come flooding in if you’re like me when all the kids are asleep and you're laying in bed knowing all too well that you should fall asleep, but nope you're laying there replaying the day of how you should of made dinner instead of take out, or not letting them watch that one last episode of “Bubble Guppies” and sat down with them instead. All of these shoulda woulda coulda, what we should be doing is say it’s okay that I got take out and I was able to actually sit down with my kids instead of stressing about what to cook for dinner, I’d say that was a mom win. We need to start looking on the brighter side of things or the guilt and worry will so to speak eat us up.
Mom guilt is real and I most definitely deal with it most if not all day about what I could do better. But I’m here to tell you, you are doing an amazing job and don’t let the “Oh what if’s” coming flooding in. The first thing I want you to feel is confident in knowing you're doing the best for your family, what works for another mama’s family may not work for yours and that’s okay. So what if so and so’s mom is baking those chocolate chip muffins from scratch and your running to the grocery store for the store bought kind, look at it this way, your kiddo is still getting that delicious chocolate chip muffin regardless of how or where it was made.
And let’s be honest, social media isn’t doing us any favors, I mean those dang on pinterest boards of how to make this gourmet chicken pot pie or DIY home decor for the kids room. Let’s be honest that glue gun and beautiful cardboard box will probably sit there for months till you actually have a minute and everyday you’re looking at that glue gun and it’s taunting you come on do it already. So why not, just stop trying to put all of these way to high standards and do what you can manage and know that its okay, your kid isn’t going to notice that beautiful name board over their bed that you worked endlessly on. What they’ll notice is if you spent that extra 30 minutes just sitting reading and cuddling with them.
A great way to deter yourself from the mom guilt is try what I do, repeat to yourself daily out loud even if you look crazy doing it, say “I’m doing a great job”, doing daily affirmations will literally train your mind into a different thinking pattern. Or try doing a daily morning journal of what you're grateful for, that’ll set the day into a positive start, keeping your mind on that track from the very beginning. Will you have days of oh darn I didn’t do the laundry or burn the rice, yes those days will still be there, but once you start thinking it’s okay laundry didn’t get done today, it’ll get done tomorrow, those mom guilt moments will start to get fewer and fewer.
Remember, today, right this minute you have with your children is the most important, don’t sit and worry about those mistakes you made yesterday, don’t let what happen yesterday dictate what good can happen today. Mistakes will happen, we are human, just keep reminding yourself it's okay, let’s it go, let it go, learn from those mistakes and keep doing your best.
What do you need to let go of today? How would it impact your life as a women, mother and partner if you let go of more worries and focused on keeping a positive mind? Please share in the comments below!