I'm Jealous of My Husband
Confession Time: I’m jealous of my husband.
I’m jealous of his freedom. Like many families, we decided it was important and the most financially responsible thing for me to stay home and raise the kids while he worked. While (most days!) I don’t regret that decision – that doesn’t mean I can’t be jealous of my husband and how free he is!
I’m jealous that he can walk out of a room without three little humans following him around everywhere.
I’m jealous that he can just fall asleep on the couch or on the bed and NO ONE would bother him or ask him questions.
I’m jealous that he gets adult interaction and adult conversation at work.
I’m jealous that he can run errands without toting the kids around.
I’m jealous that he says something ONE TIME and the kids do what he says.
I’m jealous of the peace and quiet he gets in the bathroom.
I’m jealous of his freedom to go to the gym or to “get a quick run in”.
I’m jealous of his body – how it wasn’t stretched to capacity carrying a child or having the life sucked out of him by nursing a baby.
I’m jealous of how clean his car is because he doesn’t have the crumbs, toys, sports equipment, or strollers taking up all the space in his car.
I’m jealous that he is the fun one and that “da-da” was the first words uttered from our kids lips.
But then I think about how my husband could be jealous of me. How mommy is the one to kiss the boo-boos and make the monsters go away. How they scream for “mommy” when they have a nightmare. How “Mommy” makes the food just right.
Mommy got to experience the first smiles, the first laughs, and the first steps. Mommy was the one to sniff up all the new baby smell and cuddle on the toddler pudge when they wanted them to lay with you at night. Mommy, in her dirty, dirty car, gets the dance parties to the radio. Mommy is always the loudest and the proudest at games. And sometimes, Mommy just knows the exact thing to say to make everything okay.
While a crumb free car and a nap without anyone bothering me would be heavenly – the sacrifices we make as mothers are worth every single crumb, wrinkle, and hours of sleep lost.
Mamas, what are some ways that you “keep” your identity before you became a mother? What is one of the proudest “firsts” that you experienced with your kids?